GOD BLESS WIRELESS INTERNET CAFES OMG.

Got home late tonight after an action-packed day of work drama (NO COMMENT), hurried and fed the kitties, heated up a quick dinner and settled in to catch up on what my peeps (all y'all) been gettin' up to in the hiz-ouse (this here internet thingie). I'd no more than gotten changed into my comfy clothes, eaten a few bites of dinner, and read the first few posts on my f-list when the freaking power went out!

Because the whole house is in disorder with furniture everywhere, I acquired a full complement of new bruises and scrapes trying to navigate to candles and matches. I managed to find a phone book (HOLY CRAP I CAN'T BELIEVE THEY STILL MAKE THOSE AND MORE AMAZINGLY THAT WE KEPT ONE BUT MOST IMPORTANTLY AM I EVER GLAD THAT THEY DO AND WE DID), look up the number for PGE's outage reporting thingie, and with the few remaining minutes on my cell phone before the battery crapped out, report my outage. It's affecting a whopping three people on our block -- the neighbors next door and across the street had all the electric bliss they could possibly want and were entirely oblivious to me living in the LITERAL DARK AGES OVER HERE ACROSS THE STREET IN UTTER DARKNESS YOU GUYS SUCK AND I'M NEVER LENDING YOU ANOTHER CUP OF SUGAR THE END.

Since my laptop battery was about half out and the aforementioned cell phone was nearly out, and a way awesome 1909 Craftsman Bungalow is kind of scary in the complete and total darkness when you're all alone and have an inherent fear of the dark and you have a rather, um, active imagination (shut up)...I tore through the house in a panic positive something moved in the shadows calmly and quietly changed out of my clothes that make me look like a homeless person around-the-house clothes into something that's acceptable in public my work clothes, gathered up my laptop and cell phone (and charger) and headed to Anna Banana's (Ladybug closes at 7) where I would be safe from the horde of ax murderers lurking in every room of my house could surf the interwebz among my hipster neighbors. CLEARLY I WILL NEVER MAKE IT AS A MOUNTAIN WOMAN LIVING OFF THE LAND AND SURVIVING BY MY WITS.

Keep your fingers crossed for me that the nice PGE repair people can return the miracle of electricity to my little street and take a moment to warm yourself in the glow of cheap and abundant electricity that you don't even have to think about it just comes like magic every time you flip a switch or plug something in a wall.